Four of swords

Contemplation. don't overexert yourself today. Listen to your inner voice. Meditate

Juggling

# Been juggling a lot lately,website, orders,relationships. It's good to be busy and
I've been meeting challenges with a lot of help. Trying to let the inner voice guide me more.

Within

# I have'nt been meditating and I feel it.Been so busy with the psychical realm it's easy to get lost in the illusion that the psychical is the only reality.Time to forget this nonsense and go back inside gather strength and move forward. my tendency is to go back into fear based thoughts which don't serve me or anyone around me.Enough is enough.

Comparing myself to myself

Only awoke a while ago and I've already had a day.
Meditated early to get out of my thoughts.Checked in with my
spiritual mentor[see being open]Had a cry.Now it's time to get productive.
Planning hats and shirts,just filling in for NY.
In the past I've looked around and compared my insides to others masks.That doesn't work.
We all put on our best faces for each other or so we think.When i realize that I'm doing good things for myself and I know the hell I've lived in and gone through and relived {through my own hand}.One day or a series of days you just get tired of doing the same old shit.So you bite the bullet actually feel the feelings you've been avoiding.Then I slowly changed the behavior.Not the thoughts first the behavior first{that changed my thinking}RADICAL!
So these days I compare myself to myself and realize that I'm living a miracle.
There are still challenges but I'm up to em.

Light is information

What is the point of the journey?
I believe the point is to become more authentically who we actually are.
Spiritual beings having a human experience.

How do I interact with my fellows?
I invite them in,and give them a cup of coffee or a hug[etc]
My mother taught [and I knew instinctively it was very important]
Never ask a guest what they want or offer something putting them on the spot.
Just give.

What does one get from giving?
Sharing my self and sharing my stuff whether it be material or emotional
makes me part of something bigger.It banishes the lie that I'm more important
more spiritual,somehow different than my fellow.
It honors their spirit.It undoes isolation.For both or all involved.We are part of the same energy.You are my brother.It's not about me and God it's about me and you.

How do I interact with myself?
Can I accept that I'm part of this energy? Can I accept the gift of coffee or a hug from my brothers? Or am I busy thinking I'm different? Am I worthy?
How many lies and how much isolation do I need to experience to fully actualize as an authentic spiritual being?[plenty it seems]

My personal challenge has been the ability to give but the inability to receive.
Perhaps the biggest misconception of my life[thusfar]
If I hold so much love for my fellows,why am I denying them the opportunity to be more authentic? Why am uninviting them from the party?
Can I be one among many? Or is my need to be different so great that I'm damaging my spirit and in turn my brother's spirit?
If spirit holds so much love for me and I've been invited to the party,why not just go to the party?

If I hold more love for myself
and allow my brother to hug me
aren't I being more authentic?
A spiritual being having a human experience.

Fear is a lie
Isolation is a lie
Unworthiness is a lie

p.s. Meditation allows my spirit to observe
and discover my blocks to being who I actually am